Wallace Wylie

A Week in the Life of Jeff Pollack – week 6

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by Wallace Wylie and Everett True

This week, Jeff takes his fans behind the scenes at his local fitness club.

Day 1
Just thought of a great new article for my good friends over at The Huffington Post. The genesis of this article came from so many of my fans asking me how I stay looking so good even in the rough and tumble world of high stakes capitalism. The answer is simple: join a fitness club. If you’re anything like me, and I suspect you are, then you’ll spend many hours on the treadmill keeping trim. Sometimes, though, when my spirits are flagging I need a little rock and roll pick-me-up to get me through that last mile. That’s when I got my idea; what are the best songs to run on the treadmill to? This needs some thought.

Day 2
OK, just so there’s no confusion I’m going to make some rules. Not that I want to be thought of as a “one rule fits all” type guy. We are just talking about my own personal fitness regime here. You might choose to have different rules – for example, you might want to limit the type of classic rock you listen to, and have it drawn from only one classic era. Post-1991 Nirvana is a real favourite of mine, if you need any pointers. For myself though, I like to open up the field to all types of classic rock, from 1981 – 2001 … and beyond!

  1. It has to be classic rock.
  2. No singer-songwriters.
  3. No women or hip-hop or R&B (although of course Rule 1 takes cares of that).

Now we’ve cleared that up, here’s my list:

Coldplay – ‘Viva la Vida’
What better way to get pumped than with the charismatic singing and stately song-craft of Chris Martin and the boys. Ignore the lyrics if you want to run, though: their thoughtfulness may make you want to sit and ponder instead of run. [You’ve never been in a gymnasium in your life, have you Jeff? – Ed]

Pink Floyd – ‘Run Like Hell’
Phew, hose me down. (That’s more like it – Ed]

Pearl Jam – ‘Rearviewmirror’
If this doesn’t get you pumping your fist and upping your treadmill speed to a 7.5 calorie burn per minute rate then get yourself to a doctor, because I suspect you may be suffering from some kind of hitherto undiagnosed ailment that a doctor could help fix. The passionate intensity and soulful integrity of Eddie Vedder’s vocals alone should power you though those first one-and-a-half miles.

And finally a couple of indisputable classics:

Bruce Springsteen – ‘Born To Run’
Undoubtedly the greatest song of all time, second only to Green Day. Who needs to pump iron when you’ve got The Boss – that’s Bruce Springsteen for my younger readers – doing it for us every night? You might even want to try your hand on the gruelling cross-trainer while this is playing – and at five-and-a-half minutes long you’ll soon be shedding pounds like the great man himself.

Meat Loaf – ‘Bat Out Of Hell’
It is truly inspirational to see a fat man sweat.

I’d be very interested to see YOUR suggestions in the Comments Section below. What do YOU think?

You can read part one here.
You can read part two here.
You can read part three here.
You can read part four here.
You can read part five here.

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